What an insane reality we are finding ourselves in everyday. I wake up everyday, and the new news filters in through every social media, media source, and just the people around me. The stress of the world’s situation is being felt by every human that walks this planet. Existential dread is plaguing the human race more harshly than the actual virus at this point.
And yet all I can feel is sad and disappointment. My whole body is feeling the dread of the world, but more so my own neverending problems. I feel so selfish thinking that way. My stress is through the roof as of late and there’s nothing I can truly do to make it stop or go away.
What do you even do when the whole world is shutting down around you and being alone is getting old. I honestly don’t even know how many months it has been of me living in bed and the couch. I’m so tired of not knowing. Not knowing what it is I’m doing wrong, or not. Not knowing what’s going on inside of me. Not knowing if it really is just Celiac Disease or something more. Just wondering what the answers are to the endless questions I have.
There’s no real reason for this post other than venting. Just having somewhere to let out my feelings other than the few people in my life helps a lot. Writing is my therapy. It’s a real therapy. I never realized how much power lies in writing until I had to write a 10 page paper about it in school.
I’m doing everything I can do right now to keep my stress at bay. I learned how to use a sewing machine just so I can sew masks for myself and the people I care most about, I finally bought the memorial keychain for my dog who died last year, finally signed up for a vitamin regimen, and ordered more elastic so my mask making can go further than just my friends and family.
We’re all going through things right now and grasping at all of things we can do to make a difference in the worst time that most of us have experienced in our lifetimes. I don’t think any of us will experience things like this again, so we all need to do our part. We’re all just trying to survive each day as they come, so whatever it is that gets you through the day- do it.
Even in the midst of all of this, we can only hope tomorrow will be a better day. And as long as the sun comes up tomorrow, then it can’t be too bad.
Em
The Days in the Life of a Young Celiac 